Parhaita tietokilpailuvastauksia. Har har har.
UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE
Bamber Gascoigne: What was Ghandi’s first name?
Contestant: Goosey, Goosey?
THE WEAKEST LINK
Anne Robinson: In traffic, what ”J” is where two roads meet?
Contestant: Jool carriageway.
Anne Robinson: Which Italian city is overlooked by Vesuvius?
Contestant: Bombay.
Anne Robinson: What insect is commonly found hovering above lakes?
Contestant: Crocodiles.
Anne Robinson: Wh…?
Contestant (interrupting): Pass!
Anne Robinson: In olden times,! what were minstrels, travelling entertainers or chocolate salesmen?
Contestant: Chocolate salesmen.
Anne Robinson: The Bible, the New Testament. The Four Gospels were written by Matthew, Mark, Luke and…?
Contestant: (long pause) Joe?
Anne Robinson: Who was a famous Indian leader, whose name begins with G, revered by millions, who was assassinated and received a state funeral?
Contestant: Geronimo!
RADIO LINCS PHONE-IN
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I’m sorry, I don’t know the names of any countries in Spain.
STEVE WRIGHT SHOW, RADIO 2
Wright: On which continent would you find the River Danube?
Contestant: India.
Wright: What is the Italian word for motorway?
Contestant: Espresso.
Wright: What is the capital of Australia? And it’s not Sydney.
Contestant: Sydney.
THIS MORNING
Judy Finnegan: The American TV show ’The Sopranos’ is about opera. True or false?
Contestant: True?
Judy Finnegan: No, actually, it’s about the Mafia. But it is an American TV show,so I’ll give you that.
BBC RADIO NEWCASTLE
Paul Wappat: How long did the Six Day War between Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (after long pause): Fourteen days.
BOB HOPE BIRTHDAY QUIZ, LBC
Presenter: Bob Hope was the fifth of how many sons?
Contestant: Four
BBC GMR, PHIL WOOD SHOW
Wood: What ”K” could be described as the Islamic Bible?
Contestant: Er…
Wood: It’s got two syllables… Kor…
Contestant: Blimey?
Wood: Ha ha ha ha no. The past participle of run…
Contestant: (Silence)
Wood: OK, try it another way. Today I ru! n, yesterday I…
Contestant: Walked?
DARYL’S DRIVETIME, VIRGIN RADIO
Daryl Denham: In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant: Holland?
Daryl Denham: Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant: Iceland? Ireland?
Daryl Denham (helpfully): It’s a bad line. Did you say Israel?
Contestant: No.
MAGIC 52 (NORTH-EAST ENGLAND)
Presenter: In what year was President Kennedy assassinated?
Contestant: Erm…
Presenter: Well, let’s put it this way – he didn’t see 1964.
Contestant: 1965?
WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE? (ITV)
Chris Tarrant (asking the audience): ’Jambon’ is the French for which food?
11 per cent of the audience: Jam.
DAVE LEE TRAVIS SHOW (BREEZE FM)
DLT: In which European country are there people called Walloons?
Contestant: Wales.
JANICE FORSYTH SHOW (BBC RADIO SCOTLAND)
Forsyth: What is India’s currency?
Contestant: Ramadan.
QUIZMANIA (ITV)
Greg Scott: We’re looking for an occupation beginning with T.
Contestant: Doctor.
Scott: No, it’s ’T’. ’T’ for Tommy. ’T’ for Tango.
Contestant: Oh, (pause) Doctor
SIMPLY THE BEST (ITV)
Phil Tufnell: How many Olympic Games have been held?
Contestant: Six.
Tufnell: Higher!
Contestant: Five.
NOTTS AND CROSSES QUIZ (BBC RADIO NOTTINGHAM)
Jeff Owen: In which country is Mount Everest?
Contestant (long pause): Er, it’s not in Scotland, is it?
STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (RADIO 2)
Wright: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?
Contestant: Jesus
NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Eamonn Holmes: Dizzy Gillespie is famous for playing what?
Contestant: Basketball.
DOG EAT DOG (BBC1)
Ulrika Jonsson: Who wrote Lord Of The Rings?
Contestant: Enid Blyton.
NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Eamonn Holmes: There are three states of matter: solid, liquid and . . ?
Contestant: Jelly.
JAMES O’BRIEN SHOW (LBC)
O’Brien: How many kings of England have been called Henry?
Contestant: Well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth. . . er . . . Three?
CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO BRISTOL)
Searle: In which European country is Mount Etna?
Caller: Japan.
Searle: I did say which European country, so in case you didn’t hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller: Er . . . Mexico?
GWR FM, Bristol
Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant: I don’t know, I wasn’t watching it then.
RICHARD AND JUDY (C4))
Q: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
A: Forrest Gump.
LINCS FM PHONE-IN
Presenter: Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant: Barcelona.
Presenter: I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant: I’m sorry; I don’t know the names of any countries in Spain.
NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Q: What is the world’s largest continent?
A: The Pacific