You asked were there somethings i´d like to change in our past. Now i tell you if you got the will to hear me . If i look back the time when we break up and do the biggest mistakes in our life.. i really don´t know , would i do things differently .. Some wice oldman has once said that you can´t schange the title ´s of you´re choises, i wouldn´t. Maybe i only trying to do things in another way , more friendly and more caring . But if we would not go our shepred ways , i really think that i never get to know you as good as i do now. I´ll never see who you really are , untill now . And i honer you. You´re warmth smile,the touch of you´re hands , all the things you do ..Now i see, how much those things really mean to you and i´m glad you have a woman to share those things with you. No, i can´t say i´m honestly happy for you , it´s takes time to get over this. Once i thought that our life was such a misery , pain and fights after anothers but now i see thins clearlier and i´m sad to noticed it too late. But like you say , lifes goes on. Only one thing i would schange if i only can is the moment when i hear that our baby was dead. The whole fucking world moves away from me and turn it shapes at blue in to deep night where i didn´t want you to be near me. So much pain and nightmares , for somethings i couldn´t touch with my pair hands . loosing something beautyfull inside of me, three months is a long time.. and i don´t even got the glue of that little one untill it gives up on me.
To live my life knowing there could be some little creature to hold and to care for , makes me losing my willing to live. And it still hurts me , every year when the autumm falls i only counts the years that he or she could be now. and i´m so sorry for pushing u away in that tme , when we should stick together to get over it . But what i do ? I live you all alone in this world so cruel and grey , left so many things unspoken and run away with somebody else . Somebody that only use me and tears me apart untill i´m all alone . Just like you once has been, but i´m truely glad that you have her . I just hope that it will last a life time, co´s like you said this is our boths last fly. And i´m too weak to even make my wings stronger , so if i´ll be the one who falls first i´ll let you know that i will wait you . It doesn´t matter where the hell i´m going , to hell or heaven . I will find my way back to earth to guard you and take care of you. But if things will go the way that i´m scare most of.
If you will live before me , don´t think that i´m gonna stay here . Living without you , my strenght , my pale night moon.Cause i won´t at the very moment when somebody will tell me that you no longer excist i will take my wings and reach out for my end, co´s thy my love , even if you hurting , even when you blue, have more reasons to live then me , remember that , will you do it for me ? And i´m thankfull that i have the change to get known you , there´s no regrets .